Monday, 10 September 2012

• Shit Slacker and Shimmer Say, Part 2

  This time, me and @ShimmerBodyCream talk about other Xangans.

  Me: @SentimentalDoll is the paragon of the term "jailbait"

  
  shimmerbodycream: She is sweet.
  And completely legal in my state, but I shall say nothing because it is WRONG.
  I personally have a boner for @UndyingNova

  shimmerbodycream: holy fucking shit jesus tits

  Me: I dont even want to do 18 year olds

  Me: at least be 20

  -----------------------------------------------

  
  shimmerbodycream: how strong are you
  if we wrestled in jello
  would I win

  
  Me: depends
  you are fully nude right?

  
  shimmerbodycream: yes

  
  Me: I'd win.
  SO hard.

  
  shimmerbodycream: jelloooo
  wat flavor

  Me: strawberry

  
  shimmerbodycream: cherryu

  
  Me: lime

  
  shimmerbodycream: rew NO

  
  Me: LOL

  
  shimmerbodycream: cherry lime daquiri
  I mean strawberry
  EW NOT LIME

  
  Me: i enjoyed the mispelling

  
  shimmerbodycream: I know I totally butchered that
  everytime i try to spell that fucking drink I get redlined like a motherfucker

  Me: I was talking about "rew"

  
  shimmerbodycream: oh FUCK YOU

  
  Me: fuck you too<3

  
  shimmerbodycream: GET IN THE JELLO GERALD, GET IN IT

  ---------------------------------------------------------

  shimmerbodycream: how about that one pretty asian bitch that took a pic just for you

  why not hop that

  wait is she legal

   

   Gerald: yeah shes legal

   

  shimmerbodycream: asian and she wants your dick and shes hot

  she probably lives in fucking Mongolia

   

   

  shimmerbodycream: thats how it always works

  she is hot, she's just not drenched in makeup

   

   

  Me: not really into asians anymore

   

  shimmerbodycream: what

   

  Me: the only one I'd REALLY want to hit is [name deleted]

   

  shimmerbodycream: what the fuck

  this isn't you

  this is some god damn clone isn't it

  a fucked up clone

  Yeah fuckkkkkk

  I want her too

  I'd bite your dick off if shed suck my boob

  so what race are you into now

   

   

   

  Me: I just like pasty white bitches

  so nothing special really

   

   

   

  shimmerbodycream: WHITE BITCHES!!!

  ---------------------------------------------------------

  
  Me: (fallingingreen) has hair like that
  shes pasty though so its wonderful
  and the green eyes....my weakness

  
  shimmerbodycream: hot
  does this mean you want to bang...
  WAIT FOR IT

  
  Me: I am
  what I'm saying is that we should have sex

  
  shimmerbodycream: http://josephmallozzi.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/br-ivy.jpg

  
  Me: loud
  vigorous
  dirty
  sweaty
  sex

  
  shimmerbodycream: and I'll have to get a wig
  and green contacts
  unless hazel passes

  
  Me: hazel passes
  just get a skirt

  
  shimmerbodycream: I will make it from the skins of young virgin hookers

  
  Me: I'll fuck my own redhead slut! and she'll have red hair, and green eyes, and a skirt! On second thought, forget the green eyes! and the red hair!

  
  shimmerbodycream: YES!
  what
  ILL FUCK A REDHEAD SLUT TOo
  or just loan me yours

  
  Me: what saddens me is that there are just too few of them.

  
  shimmerbodycream: clone them
  make a slut army
  to save mankind
  give them lasers
  and vaginas that have a vibrate setting

   

  • 2:53 AM
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